The time had come for junior Sarah Prep to walk across the stage and admit she was joining a club, her first one at SHS. Palms sweaty, knees weak, her mom’s spaghetti fell out of her pocket. She could hear the laughter ringing in her ears. Prep fell to the floor to clean up the sauce, the noodles slipping through her sweaty phalanges. With tears streaming down her face, she knew that she had made a mistake by coming to the club.

She couldn’t not go to any of the basketball and football games all of next year like the club wanted her to, no matter how badly she wanted to have 13 more followers on Twitter.

“I’m going to be a senior, that’s like the best year because I can just not come to school anyways,” Prep said. “I didn’t even know we had a Robotics team and what’s color guard?”

The club that Prep’s appalled by is called “The Real Winners,” and its creator junior Catherine Brown spent three days mourning the loss of their only popular possible member.

Brown claimed the club isn’t going to go to any football or basketball game, and only go to the sports no one knows about. According to Brown, the idea was inspired by the culture hipsters have created by avoiding popular trends. She hopes to encourage the nation to see how unsupportive the majority of the adolescents are towards any sport or activity that doesn’t involve attractive people.

“I tried this previously but I wasn’t popular enough,” Brown said. “Now that I have 304 followers on Twitter, at least we got 13 people to come.”
The first meeting for the club and Prep’s loss of sauce occurred on Feb. 30. They discussed the curriculum of the club and followed each other on all social medias. They failed to figure out what activities they have to attend other than baseball and table tennis. If students know any clubs that are under appreciated, contact Brown at [email protected].