The importance of self-love

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Haley Miller , Reporter

I used to be able to look in the mirror and instantly find 10 things I hated about what I saw. I’d see my flaws and think, “If I could get rid of this, then I’d be happier with myself.” The negative thoughts were emotionally draining and they interfered with my daily life.

Thankfully, I eventually discovered that self-talk was controlling the way I viewed myself. Until then, however, low self-esteem had started to feel like a handicap.

When I did something embarrassing, it consumed my thoughts, even hours later. This is because people with low self-esteem tend to recall events negatively and are “more troubled by failure,” due to the fact that they are hypercritical of their actions, according to Simply Psychology. This made it difficult for me to sustain relationships.

Another component of my low self-esteem was my avoidance of social activities. I regularly decided not to go to events in which I didn’t know a lot of people because I feared being judged. The Dove Global Beauty and Confidence Report reported that 79 percent of the girls surveyed said they choose not to engage in important life activities, such as maintaining relationships or trying out for a team, when they aren’t happy with the way they look.

I knew that I had to do something to raise my self-esteem. When I first started doing research about solutions, I doubted a process called self-talk, which is basically an inner monologue. The best way to resolve negative thoughts is to change the way you think and talk to yourself.

Practicing positive self-talk, says Psychology Today, is started by counteracting negativity. Each thought should be countered by something positive. When I started thinking critically about myself, I took a moment and thought of something I liked about myself instead. For me, this process proved to be essential to a higher self-esteem. Eventually, with the aid of self-talk, positivity tipped the scale and made me much happier with my life and myself.