Coping with Loss

Grieving doesn’t look the same for everybody


Loss is something every human being has been through, and will continue to encounter. It could be misplacing a favorite blankie as a child or the death of a loved one. Loss might be big or small, it can be forgotten within an hour or completely change a life. 

Loss comes with many different reactions. Some dress in black and cover their mirrors, others joke and smile their way through. Everyone deals with these events in their own way. It is one of the most personal and independent processes that humans go through. But, of course, like with anything else, societal expectations have been set on how people should grieve.

When people think of grief, death automatically comes to the forefront for most. Understandably of course the passing of a loved one is oftentimes life altering, be it minor or major. This, a lot of times, is someone’s first experience with a funeral. 

Think of a funeral, what comes to mind? Many would picture a dreary, dismal, dispiriting environment. It’s almost guaranteed that nobody would think of glitter and rainbows with candy being handed out at the door. This solemn, dressed-in-black image of grief is the common and expected reaction to death. 

Some may process grief with dark colors, rainy burials and silence. If that’s how a person healthily deals with loss it is perfectly fine, and the kibosh should steer clear of this procedure. But to expect this from anyone is absurd and blatantly out of line. Just like any other out of date custom, it’s dried up. The juice has been dried out of this proverbial orange and is in need of a new tree. A tree that bears a diverse fruit of ways to deal with loss. 

Undoubtedly, avoiding confrontation with grief is the worst decision possible, but if someone can harness a healthy healing process without the elementary ways of tradition, nobody should stop it. Society should embrace it instead of frowning upon it. After all, everyone is different, especially in painful moments.

Overall, loss is painful and pain is scary. But, new days will come where only the residue of good memories reside. During the shock and agony, however anyone handles their grieving is okay. To judge someone is to push them further back and impede their progress. Society must support one another in times of great need. Love and comforting help should always be the common denominator.